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Though it would put me out of a future job. LOL
Isn’t that the purpose with an education?
Hey there Cimmik,
Sorry it took me a bit to get back to you. My schedule is hectic! Of course I care. ;) I know what it’s like to feel unworthy and like you don’t measure up. I think that for most of my formative years I felt that about myself, to some degree. But at some point, and this is still a learning curve, but at some point in my early 20′s I decided that I liked who I was, despite the opinions of others. Those bullies from your past, the things they thought and said about you, that reflects on who they are, not on who YOU are intrinsically. If they are unable to see the good and the beauty of a fellow human being, there is a wound or an emotional disconnect in their own life that they need to work out. Love yourself, just the way you are. :)Also, I love Naruto! I haven’t made it through Shippuden though because… Deeeaaamn that series is forever long and it’s still going! Maybe I’ll just read the manga and skip all the filler episodes.
“When one tugs at a single thing in nature, he finds it attached to the rest of the world.” ― John MuirThank you for your kind words Kyria. I have learnt that it’s not just always easy to desite to just like myself. I’ve learnt that I need to be someone to be able to like myself, I need an identity. Earlier, I didn’t think I had one. I had to ask myself “What can you do that everyone can’t?” One thing is playing music (and I do that a lot) another thing is that I know some Japanese (that’s very unique among people around me).
I still try break free from chain, I got from the bullies but I lack when it comes to social abilities.Yeah I know how you feel about the episode numbers. I actually started watching it again from the very beginning. LOL
Life stuff cropped up and I was way behind on the episodes and I had lost track of what was going on, so I said why not just start from the start again. ^_^
You can find lists online that show which episodes are fillers, and just skip them. That’s what I’m planning on doing myself during my rewatch.
And yeah I was in the same boat myself growing up. I wasn’t even popular enough to be picked on. I was always that “other” guy in the corner that no one knew anything about and didn’t care to know anything about.
I was the perpetual new kid during most of grade school as I was always moving around and when I finally settled down in one place, I had learned that it was pointless making friends as they always disappeared anyway. And in the place that I settled in, everyone knew each other since grade 1, so even after being there a few years I was still treated like the outsider.
Eventually I learned that self worth has nothing to do with the others around you or their opinions of you. You are who you are regardless of the standards of others, as most people (especially in early years) have an extremely narrow view of life and what it means, or what’s important. The things they consider to be good or cool are generally meaningless and petty, so it’s a poor standard to try to live up to, and ultimately pointless.
A lot of people struggle to know the meaning of life and find their purpose for existing. I did for a long time as well. Eventually I decided why should I spend so much time and anguish trying to find some outside reason for such things that something else has decided on? This is my life, I have consciousness and awareness. I know my heart and what I value. I know what is right and wrong for me. So I decided that I am the one that chooses why I exist and for what purpose. Regardless of what others think, I will do the things that I want to do and live life the way I want to live it.
I also decided that my own purpose is to experience this life in whatever way I can as long as I still have it. I value uniqueness and human individuality and expression, as I find these things to epitomize the beauty of life. And I reject limited ways of thinking that try to mold others into specific shapes and images, as this is the very opposite of life.
We only have so much time, and it’s pretty short. So I try to look for new things and experiences and try them all, as long as they don’t hurt me or others around me. As just because I no longer allow others opinions to control my life, I still respect others as being the same as myself. They have their life and must also choose how to live it. If I can enrich their experiences as well, while still being true to myself, then even better. But I refuse to limit myself due to the limits that others would place on me or themselves.
In fact from my perspective such actions are rather amusing. I see it like my foot talking to my hands and asking them why they aren’t better at walking. Why should they be? They are different and that is beautiful.
I see life and existence as a whole. Nothing is separate. It is only when we choose to look at things as being separate that they are. The feet are not better at walking than the hands, because wherever the feet go, the hands get there just as quickly. They are connected. They are one.
When others want me to be something like them or act the way they do, I think, thank you. As they are already doing that for me, so that frees me up to do something else interesting.
If someone else is better at things I would choose to do, I think, thank you. As they are showing me that it can be done and how I might go about doing it.
It doesn’t matter if I ever become better than them at that thing, as that shouldn’t be the reason I do it. I should do it because I want to and because I enjoy it. How good they are should have no effect on my enjoyment. And in fact I take joy in how good they are, because they are me.
So yeah. I rarely give such personal views online. But there you go. ^_^
Oh yea. I’ve begun thinking that friends disappear when there’s nothing to keep you connected anymore. Next year I enter a scientific university. I’ve often heard from people that it was on the university they found real friends for first time in their lives. Probably because they met people with more, similar interests there.
I stopped thinking about the meaning of life, because I realized that I could spend my whole life pondering about it. I thought, it would probably be easier for people who are wiser than I to find the meaning of being. I the meantime I can be nice to people and do what I can to make the world a better place, with the purpose of making it easier for everyone to find the meaning of life. This is the starting-point for many of my decisions and the foundation for my political posture.
If everyone were identical no one would get inspired, so I think as long as I try to be unique I’ll help people around me to think in different ways which should (hopefully) result in more creative people.
About life and existence. I remember I once heard about a Buddhist scientist talking about a hypothesis that explains how everything (matter and energy) is made of consciousness. Einsteins equation E=mc^2 tells that matter and energy is the same thing, just arranged in different way. The Buddhist scientists thoughts were that consciousness is the same thing again (just arranged in another way) and when you die, it’ll still be there, so everything that exist have consciousness but not necessarily a brain nor body to use it.
I don’t normally share that personal views with anyone neither but it’s nice to talk to someone about it.
hehe this conversation is just way too cool. I’m at work so I only have time for a quick reply, but I’m always really pleased to see this kind of conversation happening on forums/social media. It seems like everything has to be communicated via sound bites these days. Thanks for the vulnerability, both of you, and you’re welcome, Cimmik. :)
“When one tugs at a single thing in nature, he finds it attached to the rest of the world.” ― John MuirYou began one of the nicest conversations I’ve been a part of here, just because you told us that you are an artist.
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This reply was modified 10 years, 10 months ago by
Perhaps I should tell people I’m an artist more often, if this is the kind of conversation that results. ^_^ Thank you both for sharing your thoughts. It’s not easy being honest like that, but I think that kind of open conversation is a is a dying art. To be honest, I think a lot of the rejection and alienation we encounter through life would be cured, or at least lessened, through that kind of openness. To see that we all carry wounds, it makes us one, and destroys the concept of “the other”.
Anyway, hopefully one day we’ll all be having philosophical conversations like this in Japanese! :)
As for Naruto, maybe I’ll just find a synopsis. Heh. But I’m also currently working my way through Inuyasha and Rurouni Kenshin because I originally watched them dubbed when I was in high school and there’s SO MUCH MORE GOING ON in the subbed versions. Plus I prefer the Japanese voice actors.
Anyway, cheers!
“When one tugs at a single thing in nature, he finds it attached to the rest of the world.” ― John MuirI think many people often don’t tell about their problems to other people, because they don’t want to sound complainingly (this isn’t a word isn’t it?) about everything. That’s also the reason why I added the last line of the first post where I “opened”.
I don’t know why I tell you this, you probably don’t care.
Oh yea. When we are able to discus in Japanese, we should (all three) meet each other and walk the Shikoku pilgrimage together and talk philosophy.
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This reply was modified 10 years, 10 months ago by
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